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[XmuffinX]

sOOooOoO. . I've been trying to get in some kind of relationship. . .but it seems like guys are scared of me or something. *sniffles*

What should I do??

[Red51]

You're funny! That alone should be enough.

If you are really serious (which I doubt), then here goes... We "guyzz" tend to think with our... well, you know. So, try smiling more. Don't shoot em down at 'hello,' let em flirt a little and flirt back. It's that easy.

I say that I doubt because you're a cute kid in an anime kind of way... a lot like my youngest daughter. "Be careful out there among the English."

[Trevor]

anoo.... I don't know but being yourself and not overly anxious or excited is always a plus! XD But butbutbutbut! don't be a conformist. that's never any kind of fun. So... be yourself, be calm (or not overly excited at least, lol), and GANBARUUUUUUUUUU!!! (HANG IN THEREEEEEEEEE!!!) Eventually you'll find someone who will really like you for you rather than just on your looks or your interest in that person. ohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoh!!!!! Almost forgot! Some guys don't like being approached. Sometimes it sets them off that they are the approach-ee and the approach-er person. (for good reason, it kinda sets the mood of the relationship. Some men like being... well... the man of a relationship and that being the approach-ee kinda makes them the undominate force of a relationship when they think that they should be the dominate force. some guys are just... meh. lawl)

at least that's what I know/infer.

[Red51]

Trevor, you bring up some good thoughts in your calm way, but the truth is much simpler than you make it out to be. I never told this sweet kid to approach men, I just suggested to flirt and tease them a little. Admit it, Trevor, you'd love it for her to flirt with you!

So, sweetie... go forth, and let the boys think they're dominating you... when the truth is, you have all the power.

[XmuffinX]

You're funny! That alone should be enough.

If you are really serious (which I doubt), then here goes... We "guyzz" tend to think with our... well, you know. So, try smiling more. Don't shoot em down at 'hello,' let em flirt a little and flirt back. It's that easy.

I say that I doubt because you're a cute kid in an anime kind of way... a lot like my youngest daughter. "Be careful out there among the English."

I'm not trying to be funny at all. You might doubt that I'm a serious person (like I care) but i'm a serious person. But i don't let the 'seriousness' overpower me... and yes, "MEN" tend to think with their "yeahs" alot. Oh... Anime? hmmmm. Thanks for the. . .ummmm....compliment i guess.

Okay...let me try to put this in another way than from before. "MEN" around my area aren't attracted to me or ummmm... just don't want to get to know me (i think). Yes, i have guys stare me down alot but they just don't come to me. So, i don't bother trying. Maybe it's just my piercings and tattoos that make them not attracted or afraid of me i guess. But i may be wrong...but it's watever.


...........Just really confused

[Red51]

Hmmm... so you are 'serious.' Ok, here goes:

Did you ever consider that by adding all the tattoos and piercings, you've limited yourself? What I mean by this, some guys are put off or intimidated by tattos (not me), and still others feel the same way about piercings (me). Still more are put off by the combo (they're thinking, "Can I bring this girl to mom's for dinner?" or something like that). Your self-expression by body deco just might scare a lot of guys in your area. I haven't looked, but I'm betting you don't live in L.A, Chicago, N.Y.C., or even Boston--

uh, ok, I just peeked: Unless you're in Indananpolis, you are really limited--I lived in IN for 16 years in Indy and Richmond, and I don't even know where your town is!

Your problem: Small town, scared boys threatened by your choice of self-espression--your body. Any way you can tone down or alter the exterior--just a little--that doesn't negate your true sense of self? I'm not asking you to go against what you believe or turn into--god forbid!--Barbie; just asking that you look over your way of dress and play with it a little. Who knows, you just might ease the shock these 'deer-in-the-headlights' kids are feeling when they meet somone more formidible than a farmer's daughter.

You can take or leave my advice, but I do feel you might really benefit by experimenting a little bit. And sorry if I tossed you a left-handed compliment... I meant it in a good way.... big eyes, pointed elf-like chin. Guys your age go for this. Sorry if what I said offended you, but you're a cute kid who reminds me of my daughter (although she's a lot younger than you). Good luck in your quest.

[Phil]

So, what's the problem? Are you a gothgirl, have mental issues, real shy? because you look hot. i love forward women that know what they want. just not psychos. i don't mind being chased either.

[XmuffinX]

I don't think there's a problem at all with me...but i just don't understand and I'm totally confused. I guess intimidation is the word for what guys think of me but IDK....and thanx =]

[Pradeep]

Hey Muffin,

Love game is not that difficult at all. No matter where your living, you allways have a chance in this department. Its the manner in which you look at others, guys, girls. Its about the interestes of others and yourself. Its about bending a little to reach.

You know, I used to go though this material on dating and pick up artist kind of thing. It didnt help me get a girlfriend but in a longer run, it did help me develop my personality and become a little more outgoing. Even though my research work here bites my ass off day and night, I take time to go partying, do some extra part time work even though I dont need it, take dance lessons, make new friends online. I guess sometime or the other, Im gonna go out of my confort zone and shake hands with that team mate who works in the next department, invite the girl who studies in the next room for a cupo tea, ask my friend's friend I met a coupla days ago if she is on ###, go to student gatherings arranged by the University, organize excursions around my place and tell my friend get his/her friend along as well. Why? What's the point in all this? To meet people. And if I look back now, I realize that if I would not have extended that hand (In a country like Germany, people dont shake hands with you, you need to do that), we would not have been friends. I met my girlfriend that way. Moral of the story: Theres nothing wrong in making extra effort to meet people, but dont get it over you if you dont succeed 99 times. Theres allways a 100th time.

Cheers!
Pradeep

[Phil]

I don't think there's a problem at all with me...but i just don't understand and I'm totally confused. I guess intimidation is the word for what guys think of me but IDK....and thanx =]

I'm not intimidated. "Let's Play."