Community

[Michelle]

If you have something personal that you are afraid to bring up because you're worried about the guys reaction, how do you do it. looks are such a huge thing to a guy. can personality overcome a physical limitation?? for instance, having a prosthetic limb?? how do you find someone who will look beyond that at the person you really are?

[Charles]

well haveing a prosthetic limb is something you cant over look when you first meet and if he has a hang up with it he is not for you i didnt have any problem with it and i dont think one else should you are still you and i love you for being you

[Henry]

For me at least, the reason a prosthetic limb would be a turn off is not necessarily 'how it looks', but the implications for what we would be able to do together. Would we still be able to go hiking and horse back riding? Will metal detectors freak out when we go to the airport? Do I need to be 'gentle' with you for fear of exacerbating the injury?

You say guys need to 'look past it', but it has potentially a lot of implications for you and your partners every day life. I think as long as you are clear on what your needs and limitations are (if any) and are able to confidently express that you are still perfectly able to do 'normal couple type things' despite this, then I think for a lot of people it will be much easier to get used to.

Of course, there are shallow people in the world who will not be able to get past it under any circumstances, but in a way you are blessed to have something that will let you know who those people are right off the bat and not have to find out the hard way later.

[Dino]

Well, maybe try to break it to him with a joke, like this one doctor said to me that I have a very serious disease.

Doctor: Knock, knock!
Me: Who's there?
Doctor: AIDS!
Me: Aids who?
Doctor: You have AIDS.

And then we laughed together for a few seconds until it hit me...

Aaaaanyways, you know when people do that trick like that you break off your thumb on hand and move it left an right and people are like "Woooooooo, how did you do that?!" Well... try it with your prosthetic limb - it's basically a same thing just on a big bigger scale. And I can also imagine it as a great ice breaker.

Yeah.

I hope that helped ya!

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[Kerri]

OK, here goes, hope someone can help!
25yrs. ago I met my first love. We lost contact, married other people so the story goes.... anyway, through ### I was able to find him again. 25 yrs. ago I got pregnant, not thinking it could possibly be his because he had cancer and went through chemo. and we were told he was probably sterile. He went to a juvenile facility and I began dating someone else. At that time I honestly thought he was the father but, DNA proved otherwise and I was shocked! Long story short, after connecting with my first love he asked if this other guy was the dad and I told him the story about the DNA test and jokingly asked "why, is he yours? well, turns out he is! no test even needed to determine that as he now has a 2yr. old who looks exactly like my son did at that age.

This man, who came back into my life professed that he never stopped loving me and me the same! there has never been a day in the last 25yrs, that he did not cross my mind. So, for the last 5 or 6 wks. we have been talking on the phone as he is an over the road trucker. We were talking up to7-9 times daily, and he was going on an on about missing me and loving me and so were the feelings mutual. Well, over the weekend or before he had told me his phone would be shut off and we would not be able to talk! I found that to be a lie it had not been shut off! he just turned it off. So me bein the person I am called the comp. and asked if he had a layover and was able to come home for a couple of days the answer.... quiet possibly! I did not hear from him in 3 days, a far cry from recent phone calls. So, here is where my confusion lies... so many phone calls in 5 wks. then nothing for 3 days and then he finally called last-nite, and when I asked why he had not called he yelled told me he was not going to tell me then went on to blame the phone bein dead. Yet in our conversation he slipped and told me that he had spoke to several people over the weekend. So he lied! why? I have been nothing but good to him, sent him money twice so he could eat and bought things for him. How is it that you can tell someone they have always had your heart, told them you wanted to be a part of their life, tell them you love and miss them, call a thousand times a day and then just stop? I do not understand! so if there is a guy out there that can shed some light on this I would deeply appreciate it!


Kerri

[Jerome]

OK, here goes, hope someone can help!
25yrs. ago I met my first love. We lost contact, married other people so the story goes.... anyway, through ### I was able to find him again. 25 yrs. ago I got pregnant, not thinking it could possibly be his because he had cancer and went through chemo. and we were told he was probably sterile. He went to a juvenile facility and I began dating someone else. At that time I honestly thought he was the father but, DNA proved otherwise and I was shocked! Long story short, after connecting with my first love he asked if this other guy was the dad and I told him the story about the DNA test and jokingly asked "why, is he yours? well, turns out he is! no test even needed to determine that as he now has a 2yr. old who looks exactly like my son did at that age.

This man, who came back into my life professed that he never stopped loving me and me the same! there has never been a day in the last 25yrs, that he did not cross my mind. So, for the last 5 or 6 wks. we have been talking on the phone as he is an over the road trucker. We were talking up to7-9 times daily, and he was going on an on about missing me and loving me and so were the feelings mutual. Well, over the weekend or before he had told me his phone would be shut off and we would not be able to talk! I found that to be a lie it had not been shut off! he just turned it off. So me bein the person I am called the comp. and asked if he had a layover and was able to come home for a couple of days the answer.... quiet possibly! I did not hear from him in 3 days, a far cry from recent phone calls. So, here is where my confusion lies... so many phone calls in 5 wks. then nothing for 3 days and then he finally called last-nite, and when I asked why he had not called he yelled told me he was not going to tell me then went on to blame the phone bein dead. Yet in our conversation he slipped and told me that he had spoke to several people over the weekend. So he lied! why? I have been nothing but good to him, sent him money twice so he could eat and bought things for him. How is it that you can tell someone they have always had your heart, told them you wanted to be a part of their life, tell them you love and miss them, call a thousand times a day and then just stop? I do not understand! so if there is a guy out there that can shed some light on this I would deeply appreciate it!


Kerri

To answer your question, Irresponsible and he is using you. And, perhaps what you remember was not as rosy as it really was.