FreeHookup Dating Community

[jazzy]

I was contacted by a former boyfriend a few weeks ago with a rather suggestive, but very joking comment to come and see him. I said that sounded great to me, but have no way of traveling 2 hours to see him.

He said: "he thought it would be fun to see each other again," and when I asked when he thought that might happen, he said "as soon as he could." What the hell does that mean???

He's not said when at all. Why do some guys do this? And if there's a problem, why not just say what it is, rather than let us guess? (Men "should" know by now that women will over-think everything if it isn't made clear.)

If you say you're going to do something, why don't you just do it? And if you can't, why not just say why?

Does this mean it may or may not happen and I shouldn't hold my breath? Or does he have no intention of following up his words with his actions?

I'd really like to know.

[Kim]

It's an ego thing! I hate to break it to you but he probably just needed to know he could click his fingers and you would go running.
I've been on the receiving end of that and it's not nice! Never again though ... i have far more self respect now than to 'jump' when told.

Take care x

[Ben]

I wouldn't hold my breath. Sometimes things just don't work out the way we want. Surprises are not out of the realm of possibility, however 2 hrs is a distance not easily traversed. A lot of your questions can go both ways. I met a wonderful girl, and spent several hours telling stories to her and some friends; generally being an all around cool frood. When the night ended she said she wanted to see me again. Smiling I asked when. Her only reply before she ran off into the fog was "Before I die." WTF kind of response is that? Why didn't she give me her number? How did I get here? What happened to my shoes? etc.
Basically what I'm trying to say here is you know far better than anyone that may reply what his intentions are (unless of course he replies in which case the point is moot), and have your answer already.

[Douglas]

Given the topic heading I have to say "Well obviously; so are some women". But anywho... either he's desparate for human/social contact, or he has an ego thing going on (i.e. I wonder if she's still 'mine to call').

Heh, sorry, but some of us guys are THAT shallow. Add to that, alot of us just don't know how to talk to women we like. And yeah, I know we're all people/humans/etc, but its alot harder to talk to someone when you want them to have a good impression of ya, heh.

[jazzy]

Hi Douglas,
I have to agree with you that women fit this category as well. I also agree with the last few things you said, because even when we went out (very briefly, a long time ago), he pretty much behaved the same way - although back then, we only lived a few minutes away from each other.

I currently get the impression that he does want to see me, but is also unsure or doesn't know how to talk to me. I also suspect that he isn't very happy with where he's currently at in his life and seems to be stalling to "tie up some things." And I also agree that he wants to make a "good impression" (as do I), but isn't "quite there yet." (And I have to admit, I'm not there yet either - impression-wise.) Also, he was also a very private person - but I would like him to know that I am also not happy with where I'm at, and that it's okay.

I don't agree that this is just a "booty call"....he was never like that before and from what he's said so far, I have no reason to believe that has changed.

As for what I posted earlier, his suggestive comment was meant jokingly and I made the choice to "call his bluff" (so to speak) and it has grown more intense since then. I have no reservations of driving 2 hours to see him - I just don't have the safest vehicle for long trips, and am hoping he'll make the trip first, but if not, I should be vehiclularly mobile to do so myself within a month.

Thanks to everyone for their post, very much appreciated.

[Special Needs]

we are all just scared of fluffy kittens!!

[Robert]

come on guys why not tell it how it is.. we haven't subscribed to the site so when women send message or wink there's no way of getting a message back to them... its called being tight arse. sad as it is its true.. ladies stop thinking the worst there's twice as many men to women on these sites so find the ones who payed the subscription....