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[Char]

thx Steve~

today one of the guys made a derogatory sound an later I heard one laugh out loud as I walked past talking. I took a risk at guessing who it might be and asked another where "sound effect man" was. Next I knew two guys were working near me. I took another risk and spoke directly to the one I suspected, "Got anymore sound effects?" (the other laughed out loud), he looked at me blankly then when I turned to my coffee machine took a step toward me and MEOWWWED at me. "I want to record it to share with A----(their supervisor)". He walked away, and from behind an older worker walked toward us and talked directly to him about "Shall we make an orange coffee" [warning light...?].

And all this because about four weeks ago I glanced at his coworkers~ all of them including him...? My conclusion, which is so much speculation, is that they really think I like one of the workers, who I think has a girlfriend (hence the meow) and sound man has made himself judge and juror whilst the others just gos.

And I'm still having probs shaking off the one that all have convinced themselves that I like~ if only his hair were not so attention grabbing~ or maybe its the shape~ I spent most of the day with my back to him.

[Char]

Steve~ your experience has given me some insight into the situations~ if I give them a chance to show themselves then it's like giving them enough rope~ so that all I need do is point to a behavior and say~ well, why I be interested in a guy that stood by while this happened/pretended to be interested in a woman/pretended to be interested and has a girlfriend.

Be nice if I had a workmate like yours that gave you some insight into the situation...

[Steve]

Steve~ your experience has given me some insight into the situations~ if I give them a chance to show themselves then it's like giving them enough rope~ so that all I need do is point to a behavior and say~ well, why I be interested in a guy that stood by while this happened/pretended to be interested in a woman/pretended to be interested and has a girlfriend.

I read somewhere once 'don't argue with a fool as anyone watching will only see two fools'. Sounds like you are seeing them expose themselves more vividly, careful because they are obviously hoping for you to respond to it, by responding you might be feeding them. Some people need constant attention where there's food they'll come back for more.
When I was studying there was this girl who needed constant attention, you could easily tell when she was getting sex was when she would not spend the day doing petty things to stop you working to give her attention. By responding she must of felt she could do this, until I figured out why some people she hated, it was a simple case that they were ignoring her. The people knew she hated them, but it was no loss as they had no interest in her and it made their day easier. You might get a load more insults whilst ignoring them but they usually making more of a public display of throwing their rattles around the room!

[Char]

ok~ I'll keep that one about the rattles being thrown in mind. The sound man gave me a head nod as I left and i said cya to show no hard feelings, I got the impression that I had elbowed the bully.

I watched a co worker today that I do not work with often, we are of a similar age though she is married and a mum~ she openly smiles and glances around, pretty much like me, yet is not being gossiped about or hassled by men~ methinks it's the old double standards. I'll practice not noticing people, side-stepping, confronting bullies in an assertive and not aggressive way and discovering ways to send messages of "not interested".