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[Drummerboy42]

Clips from Articles I've read...Is it really true?
Withholding sex seems to be a common method of punishing a spouse. We've all heard about the wife who gets mad and sleeps on the couch or turns her back to her husband in bed. Somewhere down the line we learned that cutting our spouses off sexually was an acceptable way of expressing our anger. In my opinion, to do so is a type of abuse...sexual abuse and emotional abuse.

What Does the Bible Say about...Withholding Sex from a Spouse?
Essentially this says that neither partner in a marriage has a right to deny sex with the other, except if they both make a mutual agreement to abstain for a specified period of time for prayer and fasting.

[GlainFeyth]

First off, I read the bible myself and I have to say that it doesn't mean that a husband or wife can't say no, if that were the case some people would be having sex 24/7. Women are not slaves to their husbands.

Second, I think a lot of women do use sex as a tool to get what they want or punish their man. When I was younger, I tried to use sex as punishment and I realized I was only punishing myself.

[Drummerboy42]

Thanks for your reply! I don't believe the Bible suggests that women be slaves to their husbands, I believe it meant that sex should be a regular (at least 1 x week) part of a healthy Married couples relationship! It shouldn't be forced...that's not Love to begin with!
The question stemmed from a personal experience where my soon to be Ex wife withheld sex for up to 4-5 months from me. Later found out that she believes Love is "conditional"? She told me that right out of her mouth. Of course this was after 24 years of Marriage and were newly separated at the time!
Generally speaking, her thought process was...unless you do and say everything she wanted, she would use sex as a form of punishment.
Wish I would have know her thoughts 24 years ago!!

[LQ]

WTF!!!???

You know, it's not that you've actually asked this question, that blows me away. I do feel that there are women who do use sex as a tool against their partners. It's the fact that YOU would compare this act of immatureity, to SEXUAL ABUSE! Are you a surviver of such a dispicable and hanise (sic) act? I don't believe so, otherwise you wouldn't have use such a hurtful and ignorant-shell we say, 'commentary'?

I mean, it's like comparing apples and oranges!! Shame on you!

And I read the whole book of Genises; And it says, that God told Adam and Eve to go forth and be plentiful. But if you're going to use the Good Book as your defense, than you need to catch up to the rest of the world and time. It's the 21 century,friend, come join us.

As far not being denied sex....if you're with the kind of woman, that is clearly using sex as a tool, than get the hell outa there! Otherwise, treating women with respect, will take you far.

I still can't believe you were man' enough to compare something so, unfurtunatly, common place, to an act which destroys so many lives, cracks so many souls and thus, takes away from the victom, that sex isn't a wepon or a tool, to be used to degredate, and hurt so badly; ratherthe,intimate and beautiful act of love between two people, who care and respect one another.

[kaz]

this can also be true of men! my most recent partner and myself hardly ever had sex as he's impotent but i lived with that because i loved him. However he would not discuss the problem even though i tried to be sensitive about it and he certainly wouldn't see his GP to try and get the problem sorted. In its own way it was a form of torture,at first i blamed myself then i began to get very resentful,as far as i was concerned he should have WANTED to sort it out. I'm not a sex maniac just a normal woman who believes sex should be part of a loving relationship and the ultimate way to express how you,as a couple,feel about each other. There were a number of reasons we split up but the lack of a sex life certainly didn't help.

[GlainFeyth]

I've been with a man that used with holding sex to punish me. It wasn't the way I looked either, I was a 20 year old size 5 and he was a scrawny 31 year old, he was just a completely abusive, richard. So I agree that it can go both ways. I think maybe he was having impotence problems and over compensated by telling me that I was to fat and ugly for him to have sex with me because he couldn't get aroused.

[Leming]

I've been with a man that used with holding sex to punish me. It wasn't the way I looked either, I was a 20 year old size 5 and he was a scrawny 31 year old, he was just a completely abusive, richard. So I agree that it can go both ways. I think maybe he was having impotence problems and over compensated by telling me that I was to fat and ugly for him to have sex with me because he couldn't get aroused.

Real women love sex and would do anything they wanted if she felt that it was her that the guy wanted,not just so they can get to sleep or because they have been watching porn by ### you dont make them feel wanted and special then you wont get much ### you are good at sex then they will want you all the ###s all about them ###an women withold sex,real women love it

[Glenn]

WTF!!!???

You know, it's not that you've actually asked this question, that blows me away. I do feel that there are women who do use sex as a tool against their partners. It's the fact that YOU would compare this act of immatureity, to SEXUAL ABUSE! Are you a surviver of such a dispicable and hanise (sic) act? I don't believe so, otherwise you wouldn't have use such a hurtful and ignorant-shell we say, 'commentary'?

I mean, it's like comparing apples and oranges!! Shame on you!

And I read the whole book of Genises; And it says, that God told Adam and Eve to go forth and be plentiful. But if you're going to use the Good Book as your defense, than you need to catch up to the rest of the world and time. It's the 21 century,friend, come join us.

As far not being denied sex....if you're with the kind of woman, that is clearly using sex as a tool, than get the hell outa there! Otherwise, treating women with respect, will take you far.

I still can't believe you were man' enough to compare something so, unfurtunatly, common place, to an act which destroys so many lives, cracks so many souls and thus, takes away from the victom, that sex isn't a wepon or a tool, to be used to degredate, and hurt so badly; ratherthe,intimate and beautiful act of love between two people, who care and respect one another.

Aside from agreeing with you, in this case regarding the OP I would have to say TOOL has two contexts. Further, and this directed towards the OP, I fail to see what religion has to do with the right or wrong of it, is it really necessary to even bring it in to the equation?

[Kiandra]

thats what they call... a Dominatrix ..

[Matthew Harvey]

A chick rejected me twice years ago.. and she came back to ask me out for a rebound sex date.

I rejected her

Now im going to hell

BWUAHAHHA